Self reflection- Just how good a Muslim am I?
With the name of Allah most Beneficient ever Merciful
The worth of our deeds lies in the intentions behind them, so it is very important for each and every one of us to take the time off to contemplate, reflect and think about whether we are good Muslims or not because in doing this we would recognize our shortcomings.
The Prophet ﷺ has said: “Pondering for an hour is better than divine service for a year.” Al Hadith 1:4:44:201w.
The Holy Qu’ran, whenever it gives a parable, always follows with the following sort of remark: “…So that they may reflect.” Al Quraan 7:176.
Reflection and pondering is the first step towards being a better Muslim because once we know our faults; we would then be able to take steps to remedy our behavior and character. Reflection is therefore also an important aspect of worship. Here are a few points to reflect upon so that we could gauge just how good Muslims we are.
1) Our attitude towards material possession—this is discussed in our theme article “the unmaterialistic Prophet’s solution to all our problems.”
2) Am I getting along with the people around me, especially with my family members or do I have issues with them?
Muslims should not have issues with others and we must always strive to keep friendly, cordial relationships with everyone, especially our family.
We have to be tolerant, understanding and determined to make every relationship work and we must not let anything come in between having a good relationship no matter how justified it may seem.
Being good to others is a part of ‘imaan’ (faith). We should not be thinking small by only caring for our immediate family only, but we should broaden our horizons to have good relationships with everyone, even those that we do not know or those that wrong us.
The Holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ had strived hard to bring people together so as to build a united ‘ummah’ and he cared for all of humanity. As Muslims, it is therefore our duty, at grass root level, to strive to have good relationships with everyone around us even if they do not believe as we do.
Having good relationships with everyone is challenging and very difficult. The Holy Prophet ﷺ has said that of all sins, shaytan loves most to cause dissension between people and our egos love to do just this.
“And say to My servants that they should speak only what is gracious, for satan (is keen to) provoke discord among them. Satan indeed is an enemy to the people, disuniting (one another).” Al Quran 17:53.
We should therefore avoid being contentious, especially over religious matters. By moulding our thoughts and actions to have good relationships with others we would be striving against our baser desire and this too is “jihad” and a source of great reward and spiritual blessings.
Men and Women should take care not to separate their spouses from their parents and brothers and they should instead embrace their family as their own, which it actually is. As In laws we should embrace our children’s spouses and we should treat them even better than our own children.
3) Do I judge or think badly of other people that do wrong? A Muslim never thinks badly of anyone no matter how wrong they may be. We all face the same trials and tribulations and we all sin at some time or the other.
If we put ourselves into that person’s shoes then we would realize that, given the same situation, we would probably have done the same. Imagine if we were born into a non-Muslim home. Would we have had the courage to change or would we be like most non-Muslims that stick to their religion.
Perhaps those people we look down upon have experienced some sort of abuse and had we been in the same situation we could have ended up in a worse way. Remember that when we think badly of others then we are implying that we are good and this is having pride.
Being rightly guided and having the opportunity to do good deeds is actually a great Mercy and a favor from Allah Subhanatallah so we should not think that we have achieved this and have pride in it.
“He (Allah) knows you full well (since) when He created you from the earth and when you were embryos in the wombs of your mothers. So make no pretensions to the purity of your souls. It is He Who knows best who (truly and fully) • guards against evil.” Al Quran 53:32
4) I am a person that prays regularly and I am always doing good? Does this make me feel that I am a good, pious Muslim? A good Muslim never thinks like this. Even if we know that we have done the best deeds we should never think that we are good and that we would enter paradise. Maybe our intentions behind our actions are impure and this makes all the difference. When we are over confident and think that we are good then there is no room for improvement. It is always better to be unassuming, careful and always seeking forgiveness (Tauba), for in seeking forgiveness we would get closer to Allah Subhanatallah. The Holy Prophet ﷺ, although he did so much and although he knew that he was sinless, would still seek forgiveness.
5) Am I a person that loves to talk about religion? How certain am I that what I preach is correct? Islam is vast and we will be constantly learning throughout our lives. The Holy Prophet ﷺ never preached on his own accord. He was instructed to do so by the Lord of the worlds. All prophets behaved in the same manner.
The best way to teach others is to practise our religion as best as we can instead of preaching and if Allah wills, others will learn from us. When we do talk religion we must ensure that we do it with an open mind.
Our intentions behind talking about religion must be to learn and not to teach. We must have the ability to listen and to learn from others too, because sometimes the person we are talking to might have a better understanding of what is being discussed and we could learn from him. Listening and learning is more important than teaching.
6) When last did I give charity or prayed secretly?
“Those who spend their wealth by night and by day (for the cause of Allah) privately and publicly have their reward with their Lord, they shall have no cause of fear, nor shall they ever grieve.” Al Quran 2:274.
Reflect: why does this verse of the holy Quran mention both public and private acts of worship? Doing pious acts privately is important because such acts are more likely to be sincere. As human beings we would always want to be recognized by others for some achievement or the other.
In relating an incident, have we added details such as ‘after I read my fajar namaaz I saw….’ When we do this, we may be indirectly wanting to tell others that we pray so that they may think well of us. Even just to think that we are good is wrong.
Our ‘nafs’ loves to be praised and recognized and if we give in to this we are committing shirk. (see our article on shirk). This is feeding our vanity and we need to grow up spiritually by denying ourselves people’s applause’s. What we must realize is that it is not important what others think of us but it is important what Allah Subhanatallah thinks of us.
7) Am I thankful to the Holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ by sending salutations and ‘duas’ for him on a daily basis? This is an injunction of Allah Subhanatallah and the Holy Prophet ﷺ has said that it becomes incumbent on him to seek intercession for that person that sends salutations upon him. Loving the Holy Prophet ﷺ is a fundamental and a very important article of faith (Imaan).
Just as the ‘Khaba’ is important because it is the first house of Allah and just as the Holy Quran is sacred because it is the words of Allah Subhanatallah, so too is the holy Prophet ﷺ because he is the final and beloved messenger of Allah. He is the most important of everything that is associated with Allah Subhanatallah and the proof of this is that he is mentioned in the very first belief of a Muslim.
Apart from this, the Prophet ﷺ has made great personal sacrifice to teach us our religion and has shown us the way to Allah Subhanatallah. Without his sacrifice and without his loving way of teaching the religion, Islam would never have come into being.
8) Do we care for our parents and have we made them a part of our lives as they did when we were children or have we left them to fend for themselves in their old age? Islam teaches us to be grateful to our parents and to take care of them in old age because they have sacrificed so much for our physical upbringing.
Loving and caring for our parents is the basics in Islam and this injunction is repeated often in the Holy Quran.
“And we have enjoined upon man goodness to parents….” Al Quraan 29:8 – Also 31:14 also 19:32
Parents will always unconditionally love their children and all they want is to see their children and spend a few minutes with them each day. They miss their children and when they do not see them then it is painful to them.
9) Do we know what ‘sura Fatiha’ means? The essence of our prayer lies in ‘Sura Fatiha’ and it is therefore extremely important for us to know the meaning of this sura. After praising Allah Subhanatallah we ask Him for “guidance” from the bottom of our hearts and we must believe for certain that He hears us and that He will guide us.
Without knowing what we are praying for, without consciously thinking of Him and without sincerity our prayers become just a meaningless ritual. Now when He guides us, do we have the courage and the firm resolution to follow Him or will we instead follow our low desires and hanker for what this material world has to offer?
9) Do we love debating about our religion and are always thinking of ways to beat someone in a religious arguement. As human beings we have this inclination to be contentious and argumentative so as to impress others. We love to win an arguement and this bolsters our pride and ego.
The Holy Prophet ﷺ discouraged debating and splitting hairs in religious matters because it results in segregation and sects. He strived for, and encouraged unity.
10) When we are wrong and if we cannot apologise to those that we wrong, then this is not good. We will never learn and improve on ourselves with this kind of attitude. Islam teaches us to build relationships and this is destroying them. By apologising we are standing up for truth and a Muslim should always stand up for truth even if it is against himself.
Apart from this, the ability to apologise stems from humility and as Muslims it is important to be humble. Having pride is imitating and following shaitaan.
11) Jealousy, spite and finally hatred–these are not good qualities. All these feelings come about when we are competitive over worldly possessions. As Muslims we must want the best for our fellow Muslims and when we inculcate these feelings in us then we would not have ill feelings towards others.
12) How pure is our hearts? See our article “purity of heart”
“So pay your whole-hearted attention to (the cause of) faith as one devoted (to pure faith), turning away from all that is false. (And follow) the Faith of Allah (Islam) to suit the requirements of which He has made the nature of mankind. There can be no change in the nature (of creation) which Allah has made. That is the right and most perfect Faith, yet most people do not know (it).” Al Quran 30:30.
End.
Peace and salutations be upon Allah’s Messengers who are responsible for guiding humanity throughout time. Ameen.
Published by Anjuman e Waris e Mohammedi in 2016.
The Anjuman e Waris e Mohammedi was founded by Dr/Hakim Hazrath Khwaja Sayed Shareef Ahmed Ali Shah RA (lovingly known as Hazrath Poona Wale Shah Saab RA).
Author: Mohamed Hassan Gaffoor WhatsApp; +27 84 910 1486